NLO 1386: Discount Doodle

Patrick is fully vaccinated and can now eat dog, and he got a new Goldendoodle puppy just to test the theory. Listen to the harrowing tale of how Patrick hunted and finally got a great deal on a potentially illegal or mentally defective dog. Caitlyn Jenner is trying to be the mayor of California, and Patrick doesn’t understand why she’s even worthy of consideration. As bonus evidence of our obsession with worshipping people regardless of merit, we find a video of Caitlyn singing on The Masked Singer, and it’s AWFUL. Elon Muskrat is going to host Saturday Night Live and people are super upset about it. Bowen Yang doesn’t like it, but most people don’t like Bowen Yang. Patrick gives away a sofa to a psycho who can’t stop talking about Brooklyn. Apple is going to get everyone killed with their new stalker-friendly Airtags gimmicks. Patrick’s summer is on hold due to complications with the swamp spa manufacturer, but that’s OK because our store has new RED HOT merch! Patrick has second thoughts about Elon after learning about the new Tesla “butthole” command.

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