TESS BARKER joins Patrick in studio today. Tess’s car was stolen, so she talks about her adventures busing it into the show. Patrick plays Tess his new song, The Matador, and she seems less than thrilled. There’s talk of movies, reality TV, retard types, the importance of dick size and Mike Tyson’s new one-man show. Tess met Quentin Tarantino, who she thinks might play a witch in an upcoming movie. Patrick discusses his rapidly decreasing tolerance for bullshit, and how much fun it is to burn bridges. Patrick also talks about the yacht he wants to rent in London, already crowned the USS Fuck Ship.