kc armstrong Archives • NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

NLO LIVE: The CRINGE is REAL! Drunk on Cringe EXAMINED! (August 15, 2023)

August 15, 2023

Happy Tuesday, you sack of onion gobblers! Join Patrick on an adventure in sights, sounds, flavors and flatualnts as we dissect some of the Internet’s greatest weirdos together. Today, it’s the RAY you’ve been waiting for! We watch and dissect the BRILLIANT 45 minute clusterbucket that is the Drunk on Cringe Ray DeVito appearance. This dude is so bad he’s now MASKING UP on cam! Plus we check in on KC Armstrong to see how his piano lessons are coming along. All this and more on today’s Onion. …

NLO LIVE: Patrick is Broken, KC is Broken, Steel Toe Nears Death (July 24, 2023)

July 24, 2023

He crashed and burned Friday night, and Patrick is here to tell the full tale of how to turn a disaster in to an opportunity! Come on in and hear a heroic tale of a program being rebuilt from scratch. Better. Stronger. Probably the same speed. Is Patrick quitting the MLC podcast today? The rumors are swirling like mad! Steel Toe is losing listeners faster than he is losing money, and it’s hard to tell which is having a larger effect. Patrick briefly addresses the dabble verse. KC Armstrong has been acting strange for weeks, but these recent shows are concerning. Plus we make up for Friday’s art contest that never was and announce this weeks contest! …

NLO LIVE: KC Armstrong is a Real Boy, Bower is Crushing It (July 7, 2023)

July 9, 2023

Happy FRIDAY! Join Patrick in putting a tight bow on this weeks mayhem. We have an art contest today, and it’s sure to make KC Armstrong squirm in his pantaloons! We want to see your best homo-erotic interpretation of KC Armstrong from the Howard Stern show – whether he’s dolled up with nowhere to go, or lounging around with the “boys,” we want to see it. Michael Ray Bower has been putting out no content and wants the haters to know he is killing it. What is this delusion that once “kind-of-celebs” have that makes them thing they have the clout and skills to be big stars today? …

NLO LIVE: Bower Fire Sale, A Fresh Summer Set, Chad Chugs Around Town (June 14, 2023)

June 14, 2023

Summer is here! I mean here in Las Vegas. Summer Sinclair, the famous actress and comedian. She has a fresh set you need to see. Chad Zumock is chugging around Tampa with a selfie stick and ring light, completely oblivious. He reveals yet another merch mogul has turned their back on him, as well as other lies he totally cucked everyone with. We have some good old-fashioned fun watching a rap battle. Michel Ray Bower is selling off some of his clutter from his toilet. Addicted to Profits may actually be really bad guy. Don’t miss today’s show! …

NLO LIVE: Addicted to Steel Toe, Is KC Alright? (June 13, 2023)

June 14, 2023

It’s FRIDAY and Patrick’s new album WE HAVE FUN is available! Help get it to number ne in the iTunes Charts by buying a copy today! Patrick has been to court, hence the unannounced absence yesterday. Patrick will be spilling the beans on exactly who his courtroom nemesis is and what went down during this insane exchange. Chad Zumock has seemingly allowed the alcohol in his brain to take the driver’s seat all the way to his hell gig in the middle of Georgia. Patrick gives his stale take on the Wednesday incident. You won’t want to miss this historical episode of the Nobody Likes Onions program. …

NLO LIVE: Album Release, Court Report (June 9, 2023)

June 10, 2023

It’s FRIDAY and Patrick’s new album WE HAVE FUN is available! Help get it to number ne in the iTunes Charts by buying a copy today! Patrick has been to court, hence the unannounced absence yesterday. Patrick will be spilling the beans on exactly who his courtroom nemesis is and what went down during this insane exchange. Chad Zumock has seemingly allowed the alcohol in his brain to take the driver’s seat all the way to his hell gig in the middle of Georgia. Patrick gives his stale take on the Wednesday incident. You won’t want to miss this historical episode of the Nobody Likes Onions program. …

NLO LIVE: Chad Zumock is a Lying Creep! (June 7, 2023)

June 9, 2023

Happy hump day. friends! Chad Zumock is running like a bitch after rallying his fans to choose him or the haters on Monday. We are going to go over Chad’s insane lies and mumble-filled self-soothing and find out what’s really going on. Chad has new merch and wants to sell you a shirt! Chad blames Patrick for his studio not being complete as well as people fleeing his Patreon. As Patrick predicted, no one is coming to help Chad, and he knows it. Misery Loves Company has some superchatters that think they can control Kevin and send Patrick out to pasture as an MLC guest, and Patrick is here to tell you that nobody gives a fuck. …

NLO LIVE: Redbar Ain’t Comin’, Addicted to Pouting (June 6, 2023)

June 9, 2023

Patrick is fresh off another flawless performance over at Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy. Patrick wins the battle of the superchats with his nemesis Addicted to Profits aka David Skarica. Steel Toe Morning Show’s Aaron Imholte is gleefully back in the piling on to Chad business. Chad Zumock disgusts some fans by trying to make Melton look beta, but what does that even mean? Plus – will daddy Redbar swoop in to save Chad? Not a fucking chance. Patrick tells you why on this episode. …

MELTON in the MORNING! (June 1, 2023)

June 1, 2023

It’s Thursday, and after a full day of not talking, Patrick has a lot to scream about and you people had better listen. Patrick bans James Banks for hitting the same note on the piano over and over for the entire first hour of the show. Beating jokes to death is Patrick’s job. Speaking of that, please pre-order Patrick’s special – link below. He doesn’t want to look like a loser. Ray is not a mean guy but Patrick doesn’t want anything to do with him. Ray can’t stop being anxious during a show. He is overprotective, ignores other people when they talk, and is notoriously opinionated about stuff he doesn’t full comprehend. And he doxxes his friends! Patrick goes through the PO box to find some cool fan creations as well as a lot of things to wipe with. Patrick issues an apology to a chatter who he may have seemed unfair with on Tuesday, and much more!
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MELTON in the MORNING! (May 30, 2023)

May 30, 2023

Patrick returns to Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy, and boy are his arms tired! Patrick performs to a chatroom of accolades and scorn, but takes it in stride. Patrick also gets a SUPERCHAT from KB after the show! Let’s sing ourselves a Steel Toe song and kick the day off right, and then who knows where this enchanted Tuesday could lead? …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 26, 2023)

May 27, 2023

It’s FRIDAY and Patrick has been barraged with questions and interest for the past 24 hours regarding the lawman that came to the door and brought some papers. Spoiler alert – there won’t be any big spoilers today, so you can skip watching and make your pedicure appointment instead. Patrick talks a little about what happened and what to expect going forward. Everything will come out soon enough, and you’ll all be laughing right along with Patrick about the insane nature of a man throwing elephant poo at the wall. Patrick talks a bit more about Chad and the recent MLC drama. Vince the Lawyer has filmed a fifteen minute something with KC Armstrong revisiting his gay tendencies and going over the Howard Stern show where they brought in KC’s trans lover. It’s something. It’s definitely something. …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 25, 2023)

May 27, 2023

What a week! Patrick is going to attempt to describe what’s happened in the past 24 hours, and it’s a lot. Chad Zumock appears on Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy, and they have a real reckoning. Before long, Chad falls right back in to his old habits once he finds his happy place. What does this mean for the future of the MLC podcast? Let’s talk about it. Patrick gets deep with the analysis of this appearance by the Z-Man, and at the end of the show there is a very special visitor to the podcastle – an officer of the law! Oh boy! …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 24, 2023)

May 24, 2023

Patrick is feeling fresh and pumped for a Wednesday show that is going to cover all the hottest topics he needs to dump from his prep sheet. Patrick doesn’t understand why Karl from Who Are These Podcasts can’t stop lying about him. We watch Aaron Imholte from Steel Toe Morning Show continue to gloat in the misfortune of others, possibly lie about his coffee grift, and reveal other cringe-worthy behavior. Josh Denny is up to his old tricks again by using a veiled N-word joke on the Anthony Cumia Compound Media show. Patrick gives his latest thoughts on Chad Zumock, Kevin Brennan and the drama surrounding Producer Joe from the Shuli network. Patrick gets frustrated at the chat, as usual, and so much more. The chat becomes generous in the final minutes and milks more time out of the show, and Patrick watches Perry Carravello get trolled hard by the Cart Narcs. …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 23, 2023)

May 24, 2023

What a weekend! Patrick is still soaking in a buttermilk bath to rinse the smoke out of his nasty bits, but it’s a new day and the show must go on! Kevin Brennan has apparently stricken Chad Zumock’s YouTube account and Florida’s self-proclaimed best comedian is on life support. Will he recover? KC Armstrong announced, amid a flurry of distracting superchats, that he is taking a week off to keep his composure. Is Ray trolling Chad? Steel Toe Morning Show’s Mooby and the Scrimp are being sued by Alex Jones or something? …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 19, 2023)

May 19, 2023

It’s Friday and Patrick cannot wait to just take himself to the lake. It’s the birthday of one of our most lusted-after members. Join NLO in wishing Dirty Dalish a happy birthday with a birthday card design contest. We get a very weird and exclusive tour of Compound Media behind the scenes. MLC is getting weird and Kevin Brennan is no longer in the Bob Levy business. KC Armstrong delivers his most unreal performance ever as he gets played like a grade-school recorder live on his own show! No MEMBERS ONLY show tonight – join us tomorrow at 6pm ET/3pm PT for our very first Smoke Show. Grab your own pork shoulder and cook along with Patrick! …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 18, 2023)

May 18, 2023

It’s a tumultuous Friday here at the Onion, and Patrick brought the stamina to endure. The chat is arguing and working Patrick up in to a frenzy today, with strong feelings about Chad Zumock, Kevin Brennan, Ray Devito, Bob Levy, Shuli Egar and more. Why does everyone hate Chad so much? Why does everyone pile on to Shuli? Is anyone even redeemable anymore? The constant polarization of popularity is hurting the Dabbleverse. Bryan Johnson (Tell Em Steve Dave) calls in to clarify some details about his appearance yesterday and the history of his relationship with Bob and Shuli. We watch an interview with CORNdiff and Chad Zumock. Steel Toe continues embarrassing themselves by begging fans to buy their overpriced and under-researched coffee. …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 17, 2023)

May 18, 2023

It’s Wednesday and we’re looking forward to another fun day of complete drama and more meltdowns in the MLC universe. Ray DeVito has quickly become the superchat-magnet and lolcow of the moment. Will the rift between Kevin Brennan and Shuli continue to grow? Will Kevin continue to needle the relationship with Bob Levy? Patrick launches some new merch that you’re gonna wanna grab. We break down one of the most insane responses to being roasted that has ever been viewed by human eyeballs. This KC Armstrong fella is GOLD! Spend your Wednesday right here, sweet thang! …

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 16, 2023)

May 18, 2023

If you’re seeing noise, don’t adjust your sets. The aftermath of The Shuli Network and their LIVE Pottstown, PA show has left most bystanders scratching one or more body parts. What happened out there in those woods? Who is Perry Caravello and why is everyone using him? What’s the deal with Ray? Is he actually this challenged? We plow through the most insane event of the month, next to Daryl Hall’s mom’s funeral. …