Secret Shows

NLO’s 18th Birthday, Ray Devito Can’t Win, Chad Spirals (June 2, 2023)

Happy Friday! Today is the 18th birthday of the first official Nobody Likes Onions show hitting podcast feeds. Cut to 2023 and you barely have to constantly explain what a podcast is to people anymore! Progress! Ray Devito bought a MacBook Pro from a place that most certainly ripped him off, and he tried to blame Patrick in a spectacular fail. Chad Zumock has painted himself in to a corner with no income, no friends, and no leg to stand on when it comes to arguing. Patrick has receipts if It might help Chad prove he’s the alpha. One of the most insane community dramas unfolds live in real time. It involves several simps, an elf, infidelity, plane tickets, creeps, catfights and so much more! Plus, a Friday art project – let’s see your predictions for Chad’s new shirt idea!

Members Only Show – May 26, 2023

It’s Friday and our members only show is about to start popping, so grab an XL soda pop or a bucket of ketchup and get in here! We start out watching our favorite Untrainable, Ray DeVito, as he podcasts yet again about his lack of knowledge and interest in anything other than beer, women he won’t take a shot with, and emo bands he loves. The latest nonsense regarding MLC and Chad Zumock is in the air. We switch over to Pottstown, PA where Bob Levy, Shuli, and Perry Caravello are live streaming, and Patrick is blown away by how insane it is to watch people use a handicapped mentally ill man to get superchats. We finish with our very own naughty elf, Dirty Dalish, sharing a very culinary sexual experience she once had, and diving a bit in to the men on the podcast that is interviewing her.

Members Only Show – May 12, 2023

It’s Friday and our members only show is about to start popping, so grab an XL soda pop or a bucket of ketchup and get in here! We start out watching our favorite Untrainable, Ray DeVito, as he podcasts yet again about his lack of knowledge and interest in anything other than beer, women he won’t take a shot with, and emo bands he loves. The latest nonsense regarding MLC and Chad Zumock is in the air. We switch over to Pottstown, PA where Bob Levy, Shuli, and Perry Caravello are live streaming, and Patrick is blown away by how insane it is to watch people use a handicapped mentally ill man to get superchats. We finish with our very own naughty elf, Dirty Dalish, sharing a very culinary sexual experience she once had, and diving a bit in to the men on the podcast that is interviewing her.

SPECIAL: Legion of Cranks!

Our favorite Shuli Network nuts Bob Levy and Shuli Egar are headed to the big city to appear on Legion of Skanks with Luis J. Gomez, Big Jay Oakerson and more. Let’s watch an see if his really is intent on starting Podcast Wars 2023 or if this is all just fun and shames. Kevin is back on the defense as Chad rakes in the superchats and successfully silences Kevin’s lines of communication. What will happen next? Let’s go!

MLC EMERGENCY SHOW!

EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! Just kidding! This is a podcast on a platform for videos and Patrick is a comedian. None of this is of any importance! Patrick watches the late night MLC stream featuring Bob Levy and Ray Devito. Ray keeps saying insane things and lying while trying to still appease everyone. He’s a lost cause. Kevin Brennan and his guests get drunk and have a blast. Patrick gets talked (or superchatted) in to doing another hour, and we wade in to a disgusting minster named Mersh. A superfan named Brandon shows up and superchats about $500 in just a matter of minutes. Hero? Drunk? Who knows?

MLC Aftershow – May 4, 2023

Patrick is scheduled to appear on Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy on Thursday, May 4, 2023. Come join Patrick and whoever wants to call in and give their opinions after the show on the most controversial onion on the internet? Who did Patrick cuck out to? Promise you’re never gonna listen again? Is Patrick the new Stuttering John? We’d love to hear your hottest takes about the MLC universe right here! Chad Zumock calls in. Ray Devito calls in, Patrick gets all the hot takes from the chat.

Members Only Show – April 28, 2023

It’s Friday and our members only show must go on! Come on baby, light my fire. Come on and inflate my tire. Let’s stream HBO’s The Wire. Chad Zumock gets called a liar. Stevie Lew don’t know about mire. Bologna is that Oscar Meyer. Frodo is about that shire. That chic Gaaa could not be shyer. The Chrysler building has a spire. You dig? Patric does a low-key freestyle hang with fans as we check in on some of the most iconic, insane and boring people in the podcast-verse. Who will win the award for creep of the night? Is Tom McCaffrey interesting on other podcasts? Remember Jake’s finger this morning? Does anything even matter after that?

Members Only Show – April 21, 2023

It’s Friday and our members only show tradition continues! Join Patrick as the chat baits him in to some of the most stupid conversations. Patrick tries to finish all the weed in the studio but the cough is a lot. We talk about the latest Chad and Kevin Brennan drama, including today’s drunken streaming of the MLC Podcast. Hipstar is one of the most awkward motherfuckers you’ve ever seen in your life. Stevie Lew doesn’t show up. The women refuse to abandon this show. Moody and Patrick try to out-embarrass one another. We catch up with Michael Ray Bower. We find out what a Kevin Dumbrowski is. Crazy Joe may be on the verge of a renaissance.

Melton in the Morning – April 18, 2023

Come along and join Patrick as he embarks on a comedic journey to create the PlayPlace of podcasts! This morning we celebrate the wonder of the McMuffin, and you may even see Patrick eat himself silly and pop all over the place. That sounds like something nasty, but we assure you it isn’t! Huzzah! Warning – don’t do this. Patrick is an untrained professional with absolutely no experience and absolutely no expertise in competitive eating or dietary intake. This is a dumb show for dumbs.

Melton in the Morning – McMuffin Monday

Come along and join Patrick as he embarks on a comedic journey to create the PlayPlace of podcasts! This morning we celebrate the wonder of the McMuffin, and you may even see Patrick eat himself silly and pop all over the place. That sounds like something nasty, but we assure you it isn’t! Huzzah! Warning – don’t do this. Patrick is an untrained professional with absolutely no experience and absolutely no expertise in competitive eating or dietary intake. This is a dumb show for dumbs.

Steel Toe CRUMBLES on Compound, Fag Dad, Crazy Joe & More!

It’s Friday night and Patrick decides to have some adult juice for the first time in a couple weeks, and it goes off the rails very quickly. Slurred speech and lack of ability to focus are only the beginning of the derailment of this train. Patrick announces a goal for the night and the expiriment doesn’t necessarily go as planned. Find out why peanut butter cup wrappers and paper towels are flying arounf the studio for the majority of this over four hour long debacle of a program. Patrick spills so much drink that nothing may work again. We watch a video of Aaron Imholte from Steel Toe Morning Show where he opens up about his beta relationship with April Imholte. It’s very funny and very cringe. All the women of the chat gang up on Patrick and call the show to prove they are real ladies, and Earl Skakel missed it all.

LADIES NIGHT! Peanut Butter Cup Challenge!

It’s Friday night and Patrick decides to have some adult juice for the first time in a couple weeks, and it goes off the rails very quickly. Slurred speech and lack of ability to focus are only the beginning of the derailment of this train. Patrick announces a goal for the night and the expiriment doesn’t necessarily go as planned. Find out why peanut butter cup wrappers and paper towels are flying arounf the studio for the majority of this over four hour long debacle of a program. Patrick spills so much drink that nothing may work again. We watch a video of Aaron Imholte from Steel Toe Morning Show where he opens up about his beta relationship with April Imholte. It’s very funny and very cringe. All the women of the chat gang up on Patrick and call the show to prove they are real ladies, and Earl Skakel missed it all.

Ask Me Everything – April 4, 2023

Need someone to break up with your significant other? Can Patrick work something out between you and your boss, or a parent? Need advice on how to repair something in your house? Have a barbecue problem? Want to know what’s wrong with you? Patrick can help! While answering we explore Tim Heidecker, Patrick’s old standup videos from his super-fat days, Simply Sara, Adam Dominguez and more. We also uncover the Kyle Majestic archive and the world may never be the same.

Melton in the Morning – April 6, 2023

Good morning, fish! The forecast calls for big scrimpin’ and lots of coastal cope cascading the cape! Get it? Alliteration! Aaron reveals what The Tampa Papers are and it’s the most insane thing you’ve ever seen. Corey Adams was on MLC and apparently it was A LOT. Watch as we break down Corey’s insane personality switch, not understand why people don’t like it, and then proceed to lie about Patrick while admitting he’s mad. Have some chamomile and take a nap, Corey. We sell a lot of hats and Patrick needs Kevin Brennan to stop being mad at ghosts he made up in his head.

Melton in the Morning – April 5, 2023

Who will be Mooby’s co-host on the first Wednesday morning with a Corey-free Steel Toe Morning Show? Will it be The Scrimp? What will today’s mid-show snack be? What are The Tampa Files? Will Chad be in trouble? Can Patrick really help you save money on your car insurance? All these questions and more may be answered, but remember that they probably won’t be. We remind every one of Corey Adams potential, we get some great new Aaron and Thai poetry, and Patrick gives his thoughts on Chrissie Mayr while the chat keeps on hating. The best part of today’s show is Aaron trying to convince himself, The Scrimp and the audience that he’s done all he can do on the internet, there is no real competition online, and he needs to return to a small-town terrestrial radio station with April to prove he’s number one without a doubt.

Melton in the Morning – April 3, 2023

It’s Monday, and that means a whole new week ahead to try and decipher why we are trapped on this stupid rock, and more importantly, when will this all end? Join Patrick and a cast of animatronic fish as they navigate the world of teenage depressing and lighthearted friendship. We start the show with Patrick discussing a sensitive topic that makes the chat uncomfortable, but who really cares? Today we’re acknowledging the monotony of Mooby and the Gimp, and watching an old Steel Toe Morning Show where April cries several time on camera because her boyfriend lost hisTwitch stream. Mooby and the Scrimp then proceed to alternate between mad and sad, triumphant and defeated, depending on the chat messages.

Steel Toe Watch Show – March 31, 2023

It’s FRIDAY and it’s been one hell of a week for our favorite couple, Aaron and Ape of the Steel Toe Morning Show. With Aaron hot off his interview with Ray DeVito in what’s being called the most softball circle jerk on the internet this year, he’s sure to be doing extra victory laps and drinking huge glasses of gloat milk. Let’s join together to see how strong the velcro holding Mooby’s girdle is as his tits will surely be perky this cold Minnesota morning. We will be taking listener submitted drawings of what they think April’s mom might look like. Get your Crayons out!

Ray DeVito VS. Steel Toe Morning Show

Ray Devito has landed an interview with the internet’s hottest grifter, Aaron and April Imholte from Steel Toe Morning Show. But Ray has a reputation for going along to get along, being non-confrontational and toothless with his interviewing skills. Can Ray get his act together enough to ask the tough questions? Almost certainly not. Will Ray be able to hold Aaron’s feet to the fire and not accept his worming his way out of topics he doesn’t like? Definitely maybe most likely not. But will it be fun to watch Steel Toe navigate the treacherous waters of one of the safest interviewers performing amidst some of the meanest and most pointed superchats ever. Will it be worth watching? Find out with the Onions!