covid Archives • NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

Melton in the Morning – May 3, 2023

May 3, 2023

Stevie Lew is on Steel Toe Morning Show today! Will it be good? Funny? Silly? TOO much? We find out! Plus all the latest gossip from Chad, MLC and those crazy boys! New evidence has been made available which appears to show Chad on camera while the phone call comes in to Bob, meaning Chad could not be the one who made the threatening call to Bob. Yet some people are not sure. Stevie Lew geeks out on Steel Toe, giddy over being on the show with one of his comedy heroes, Aaron Imholte. Lil Mir is officially the spiritual leader of the Onions. We reach 500 members thanks to some very generous chat members giving up the goods! Thanks for hanging this hump day with your favorite hump-back host! …

Melton in the Morning – May 2, 2023

May 2, 2023

It’s TUESDAY, TUESDAY, gotta get down on Tuesday. Everybody’s waiting for the mid-weed, mid-week! Patrick begins the show discussing yesterday’s controversial show with Kyle Anderson, Patrick wades in to the latest insanity in the MLC versus Chad Zumock universe, not knowing exactly where this conflict is going or why. Bob Levy unloads on Chad after a supposed phone call at the end of Monday’s MLC show where Chad calls in and threaten’s Levy. Was it Chad on the phone, though? Can anyone piece together the timeline and divulge if it was even possible that Chad was behind this call. Is there any chance of deescalating these men and getting them to settle their differences. We also check out Mooby’s girdle and watch his latest insane spin on Steel Toe Morning Show and their prize night. …

Melton in the Morning – May 1, 2023

May 1, 2023

It’s a new week.- a new month, for that matter – and we are kicking it off with comedian Kyle Anderson, one of the only people insane enough to wake up at 2:30am to do a podcast for the promise of nothing but dozens of likes and some cold McMuffins with a friend. Kyle is a comedian who you may know as the creator of a certain popular viral video documentary about a comedian you may or may not have messages from in your DM’s. Watch as these two obese men giggle nonstop at the nuance and depravity of the likes of Steel Toe trying to launch a coffee and Michael Ray Bower plugging merch and explaining conspiracy theories. …

Melton in the Morning – April 28, 2023

April 28, 2023

Happy Friday! Another week of calamity over in the Imholte household has Moby and the Scrimp shambling and constantly worrying about their bottom line. Sometimes they hit the goal, sometimes they don’t, but it’s always accompanied by a rant against the haters full of lies and copes. Bob Levy calls in to talk about recent drama with Chad Zumock and The BS Show. Tom McCaffrey is a real bitch of a comedian. Ray gets bodied on his own show again and wants to do solo shows now. Carlos Danger is a good guy. Chad Zumock is continuing to try to take a shark bite out of MLC. Jake Hudson shows us what southern cooking is all about. …

Melton in the Morning – April 26, 2023

April 26, 2023

Happy Wednesday, ya worms! So much drama in the NLO, it’s hard trying to keep up with who to be angry with. We talk about elves and why they are so hot, and all the guys in the chat room try to get it in with one of our own. The ladies of NLO are the hottest on the internet. Moody brags about being able to get a new booster soon for the thing that we all forgot about. Some intense discussion follows. Jake Hudson shoots his loyalty load too early. Bob Levy has had about enough of your bullshit. He’s fighting with Chad and taking down anyone who gets in his way. The mudshark marches forward. …

Aftershow 1452: Neil Degrasse Tyson Meltdown

January 25, 2023

Neil deGrasse Tyson has a complete meltdown on a podcast when confronted with facts and data regarding the big pandemic shot, and it does not sit well with the Internet. Emotional, flailing and unable to self-soothe, Tyson spirals out and we are here for it! Did you know he’s a scientist? He will remind everyone over and over, so don’t worry! “Okay. By the way, I’m — I’m not claiming to be the expert on all this. I read all the same things you have. But I’m a scientist, so I read it as a scientist. Okay. They were trials. That’s what the point of phase 1, 2, 3 trials are all about. They’re tested enough to get data on how to then advise the larger population. Yes, It was tested. For you to say it wasn’t tested, is a gap between your awareness and understanding, how things work and what actually happened.” …

NLO 1409: R3C0V3RY+

February 8, 2022

Patrick has been to the edge of 0MiCR0N and returned to tell the tale! He can’t breathe – go easy on him! There’s an awful rumor about Patrick going around. Patrick admits he may have been wrong about Twitter, but warns simple-minded addicts. What is Josh Denny doing? Dipping our toes once again in to a man that doesn’t understand the fine line between being based and being brain broke. Patrick had new artificial turf put in his back yard, and it matches the drapes. There’s a new breed of no-thinkers on the internet that Patrick is dubbing AggroDems. It’s basically angry SJW’s that do nothing but work out and have super-intolerant hot takes. Strap in for the not-so-serious debate! …

NLO 1369: Dranksgiving

November 30, 2020

Patrick gathers all the people from around the internet who want to escape from their families in to one chat room to guilt eat and cry. Patrick is getting close to signing on his new house, and has stories about HOAs for days, but the chat doesn’t seem impressed. Patrick drinking always ends up leading to some really dark ideas. Does anyone wanna do some cool YouTube channel stuff as a prank? …

NLO 1368: Hubblicious

November 23, 2020

Patrick is sick once again and is paranoid about the coronavirus again. The studio is about to be wrecked as Patrick’s landlord finally agreed to install some auxiliary air conditioners. He’s also waiting for the last hurdle of his home-buying adventure by trying to get some documents from the Homeowner’s Association. All the old cables and equipment must go! We’re going to be all powered by Unifi now. Patrick has a real beef with Hubble contact lenses. …