trump Archives • NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

NLO 1441: Musk Mandates

November 16, 2022

Patrick is in a mood and he’s here to take it out on your ear holes! We’re relaunching PM in the AM over on Rokfin and Patrick has some plugging to do about it. Patrick thought there was a ghost in the studio and yelled at the curtain for no reason. The midterm election is right around the corner, and Patrick has some opinions on how stupid all of it is. Paul Pelosi has been hammered in the head, which is crazy! The chat gets very uncomfortable as Patrick tries to shake people away from being radicalized robots. Reboot your brains and start thinking again for the sake of society. Patrick talks about why starting your own whatever never works anymore. Practical home alarm system advice is hard to come by, but we’ve got it here …

NLO 1377: Build a Bubble

March 4, 2021

Patrick starts the show out with a mini rant about Twitch and their weird mechanisms for creators. A string of rapid subscription triggers something called a hypetrain, and that seems inappropriate. There seems to be some memory of Golden Corral that has triggered a very emotional rant from Patrick about chocolate fondue. The show had the best of intentions, but an off-handed line intended to support an argument triggers a tangent of conversation, aggravation and consternation that eventually leads to a fan getting upset at a chat bot, spinning out, and quitting the show. …

NLO 1375: Stonky Kong

February 18, 2021

Patrick is settling in to the new studio, and while there’s still a lot of adjustments to make, there’s even more crap to talk about that’s happened in the past couple of months. Patrick has finally gotten a haircut, and he wants you to know about it. We talk about all the recent market moves, from the recent GameStop peaking to the latest developments in Bitcoin. Patrick wants to get a Tesla, and he thinks Bill Gates is jealous of Elon Musk. We skim the top of some political stuff, and Patrick gets outraged at the though of others having opinions, as usual. The Super Bowl was a massacre, but Patrick loved it. …

NLO 1366: Warbly Porker

November 20, 2020

Patrick is balls deep in the house buying process, and the stress is beginning to take it’s toll. He’s intimidated by the prospect of taking on the project of installing a pool in his back yard, and he feels pressured by Big Pool. Costco has a lot to answer for when it comes to how he was treated recently at the optical center. Along with being ignored at the service counter, he’s sick of being stalked like a D-level celebrity by cashiers. …

NLO 1362: Know What I Meme

November 9, 2020

Welcome to morning hot talk with the bow boys. Patrick welcomes you to Gum Club and talks about how all the gum comes from like two companies, collectively known as Big Gum. Gum Club is sponsored by Brandie’s Bows and Cheryl’s Barrels. These shows were recorded before the election, so the amount of foreplay in the air between two old men is salty and thick. Jack in the Box is gross, bows and so much more more. …

PM in the AM – Thursday, July 23, 2020

August 9, 2020

Patrick is buzzing for a few reasons this morning, but the most likely reason is the nicotine coursing through his vains. Juul Gang in the house son! Patrick is treating himself to some pods for a road trip to Phoenix. He’s also pumped to hear Donald Trump come out and talk to the people about coronavirus. There’s nothing like seeing a leader address his people! Making America great again – it’s just what the man does best! …

NLO 1330: Fireworks & Furloughs

June 29, 2020

Patrick is drinking for the first time in about a month, and Roy Johnson joins in from Tulsa. It’s late on a Friday, it’s hot in the desert, and it feels like the world is ending. Sláinte! Patrick doesn’t understand why Microsoft ruins anything it touches. People need to stop setting off fireworks for no reason. Patrick pitches his idea for a new quarantine haircut business. …

NLO 1329: Pizza Stoned

June 25, 2020

Roy Johnson checks in from Tulsa to take us on another Uber Eats adventure, and this time we are having Outback Steakhouse. G’day, dopes! Patrick doesn’t really know what to think of anything anymore, much less the latest round of MeToo-ings going around. …