NLO Shows

NLO 1451: 9th Island Naive

January 18, 2023

Patrick has received a threat from Kitty Pineapple and it is not good. Could Patrick be on the verge of being cancelled? You decide! Nah but seriously, David Lee aka Kitty Pineapple aka Island 9 Fit Guy tried to blackmail Patrick, and it did not work in the most spectacular way. Why do Kitty Pineapple’s threats carry no weight? Why can’t she seem to focus on what she is actually upset about? Has this mediocre nobody confused herself so badly with someone who is successful that she thinks she has the power to “ruin” other comics? The delusion is strong with this one. We wish Penny Prince a happy birthday and try to focus on some of the positives of the Las Vegas comedy community. Lex Las Vegas is mad about something, but he’s so emotional and broken we can’t really tell what. …

NLO Shows

NLO 1450: Bummer Sinclair

January 18, 2023

Patrick addresses some misunderstandings and makes some apologies for his past aggressions. Lex Las Vegas and Leah Menudo don’t deserve to be treated like common crooks. Kitty Pineapple is still just a gimmicky joke. Patrick has some tips for smoking meats. William Strange is a broken-brained, weak sourpuss of a man who uses being a victim to gain sympathy when it’s convenient while acting like a complete psychopath himself. Summer Sinclair raised her hand recently in a Facebook thread that was asking for female headliners, and no one deserves it less. This chick is closer to Andy Kaufman than any trans Dole whip out here in these streets. Patrick offers some advice to comedians who think that lying to themselves and others in a healthy look. …

NLO Shows

NLO 1449: Gritty Pineapple

January 16, 2023

We hope you’re full of Christmas goose, or suckling pig, or tofurkey and whatnot, because Patrick has restocked the whiskey barrel and charged up his FPV drone for a fantastical flight of fury. This show is about heading in to 2023 with a healthy perception of reality. For instance, is Casper actually a decent comic? Does filming a two minute video do anything to drive your enemies crazy? Is David Lee actually Kitty Pineapple? There’s so many things to talk about in this show, and at times it gets a bit tense, but stay grounded, kids. It’s not about who the next Andy Kaufman is. It’s not about whether you get recognized everywhere you go. It’s about whether you sound mentally ill when you say things, and Patrick is the king! …

NLO Shows

NLO 1448: Lax Las Vegas

January 11, 2023

Patrick gets an anonymous angry email regarding several people on the Las Vegas comedy scene! We have so many new rabbit holes to go down! We talk about comedian David Lee aka Kitty Pineapple and try to figure out what’s going on with that situation. Lex Las Vegas loves everyone in town, but we aren’t sure that’s a great thing. A pregnant open mic comic named Caitlyn Daisy B is being roasted in a smoky bar, because she’s an absolute killer comic and a legend on the Vegas scene. Jkjk it’s a garbage fire that won’t light because it’s soaked in amniotic fluid. Skippy Sprinkles is not good or funny, and it’s getting sad. Honesty is dead amongst comedians. …

NLO Shows

NLO 1447: Forgetting Sara Schaefer

January 1, 2023

We talk about the fallout of the latest show about Butch Bradley and his misbehaving. The Sword and Scale podcast needs to be investigated. Lex Las Vegas and Trouble in Vegas are taking over this town! Casper quits YouTube in embarrassment. Patrick thinks people should stop being nice to everyone. Remember Sara Schaefer, the dead weight Nikki Glazer tried to carry around for a couple years? Patrick reminds viewers that before her big MTV break, Sara Schaefer thought she deserved to be a full-time comic, despite the lack of talent. She quit her job and begged for money in exchange for potholders she knit in her tiny Brooklyn bird box. We walk through what Sara has been up to since, and it’s mostly breakdowns and editing punchlines out of her own stories. …

Aftershow Video

Aftershow 1446: A Donkey Lips Christmas

December 27, 2022

Remember the show Salute Your Shorts on Nickelodeon in the 1990s? Of course you do, you little rapscallion. Donkeylips, aka Michael Ray Bower, has been an actor his whole life. But a few years ago his parents passed away, he ran out of money, and moved in to the saddest apartment in Hollywood and started cooking tacos in his own toilet. This latest update from Camp Anawanna's favorite fat fuck is even sadder than the ones before it. Pour some egg nog, maybe fry up some toilet tacos or another disgusting snack, and sit back and listen as Michael Ray Bower tells us why things have been so hard for him for the past few years. God speed, little friend!


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NLO Shows

NLO 1446: Tip Me, Daddy!

December 27, 2022

Patrick is here on a Friday night, and the drinks and opinions are flowing. On this show, Patrick explores Donald Trump’s latest scam – collectible NFT trading cards, featuring some of the sickest Trump memes out there. What is he doing with this money? Who are the idiots advising our leaders? Elon Musk becomes more and more unhinged as he lets his personal emotions dictate policy at Twitter, sometimes with very little notice to users. Is someone after him? Doesn’t he have other companies to run? The White House is probably lying. Wild Fork Foods sends Patrick a very special gift package. Women are confused about who they are and how they are supposed to behave ad relate to men on dates. …

Featured Videos

FREE BONUS: Thai Rivera RUNS AWAY To Austin!

December 19, 2022

Grrrl can you believe it? Our favorite little Asian girl, Thai Rivera, has run off to Austin, Texas, exactly as predicted by Patrick over one year ago. She is nothing if not super basic! We watch Thai explain in his normal exhausting way the basics of moving as only he can. Poor Bijou! Patrick has new predictions that you're going to want to bet on down at your local sportsatorium. Will Thai find the friendships, respect and popularity he is looking for in Austin? Or will he be spit out the bottom of the open mic scene just as he has in Phoenix twice, Los Angeles, and Las Vegas? Will he be banned from the clubs there like he is here? Will his "friends" like Tim Dillon and Tony Hinchcliffe put up with his ignorant gay sass in their town?


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Featured Videos

BONUS: Getting Weird and Looping

December 17, 2022

Patrick has a looper and it's Friday night, so why not get together and see what happens about it? Thanks so much for making NLO a part of your being! Some guy tries to get Patrick into a crypto scam called VECHAIN! Patrick has some vodka for a change. A troll throws money at the show and claims victory! We talk about the Established Titles scam with a real scotsman. We get in to how insane Kanye West is, and someone in the chat brings up a video that Kanye was in about Joe Rogan and mechanical bees. I'm not sure what's edited and what's real, but one thing is for sure - Kanye is bananas on a level we can't begin to comprehend.


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NLO Shows

NLO 1445: Bitchin’ About Butch

December 16, 2022

Patrick is sauced up and dives in to the always-entertaining world of comedian Butch Bradley, detailing his bad behavior over the years, including his attempt to slander, libel, and fail to pay Patrick for services rendered. Who is this INSANE and UNHINGED comic, where did he come from before the Las Vegas scene, and why is here here? Patrick talks about his LA Comedy Club residency, his questionable treatment of friends and loved ones, and the facade and uncomfortable vibes that make up the world of Butch Bradley – the FUNNIEST comedian in Las Vegas! Don’t you agree? 😂 …

NLO Shows

NLO 1444: Kill Carlson (aka Jill Tony)

December 16, 2022

Everyone is living in their own insane little bubble and Nobody Likes Onions is here to cover it all! On this show, Patrick roasts comedian Trixx for his woke virtue-signalling, Big Irish Jay for his towel usage, and Lindsay Glazer for a WHOLE LOT of reasons we can’t even begin to describe. We breakdown the Jill Carlson appearance on Kill Tony at Skankfest Las Vegas in a fair and measured manner. Rokfin needs someone to guide them to success. Patrick talks about a lot of people cryptically to avoid virtual eye contact. Men in our society are acting bonkerz. Cool Cat has a new project and is looking for people to join in. Did we mention Lindsay Glazer may be a loon? …

Featured Videos

Melton in the Morning (Nov. 3, 2022)

December 6, 2022

The midterms are next week and the state of this country is truly depressing. Our choices are limited and our fundamentals are flawed. Patrick spend the majority of the show discussing the broken system and rampant denial of reality that seems to be affecting everyone in America in modern times. Kanye West fans have decided to raise money on crowdfunding platform GoFundMe for the rapper to return him to billionaire status. The fundraiser has been removed but that hasn't stop the narcissism greed train from continuing on the platform. Affirmative action may be the one thing we all fundamentally agree about but will never vote together on. Hot cookies don't come easy.


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