comedians Archives • NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

NLO 1432: Soylent Green Comics

September 8, 2022

Patrick is off to NYC and Europe for a few weeks, so don’t get your bunch in your panties about it. Patrick cannot get over the comedy groups in Las Vegas, and the clueless people who constantly post their insane creations for no discernible reasons. The Comedy Cube is tricking comedians left and right in to doing comedy in a warehouse in Los Angeles. Andrew Schulz is circling back to grift his dumb fans with his special for the second time, and they’re lapping it up! Saudi Arabia is out of control and is vowing to build a whole city in a narrow mirrored glass strip in the desert. It looks like a disaster that can’t possibly function before ground is broken. …

Aftershow 1427: Deep Krum

July 26, 2022

We explore a deep dive interview with Angie Krum and we learn so much. You may want to alert the international authorities, because Patrick is pretty sure that Angie admits to trafficking stimulants across the border in to the United States. It’s true what they say – Krum’s do have more fun! We don’t get two sentences in to this interview before Angie starts talking about penises and sex and all the sex and penises she’s had. She talks about how guys can’t satisfy her, and she travels the world doing guest sets and banging guys, and that’s what comedy is. Also she wants a boat and to travel and do movies and tv. You know, real little girl princess shit! …

Aftershow 1396: Thai Rivera Tries and Lies

August 8, 2021

Patrick dives in to the latest microagression on his ears that is Unbothered. Thai Rivera hastily recounts the events of last weekend where he was allegedly assaulted by another member of the comedy community. But is everything as it seems? Is Thai really the victim he wants you to think he is? He is claiming that the attack was racially motivated, but also that it stems from hurt feelings over a Facebook blocking. It’s sad to watch a man try to play tough but also work every possible angle in the world to be seen as a victim. The delusion reaches new heights, and of course he wanders down a million paths in his memory, reliving countless past altercations and times he has had major fall outs with friends. It’s almost like there is a pattern, but someone is too dumb to see it. …

Watching the Throne – Part 3 of 3

July 14, 2021

In this third installment of Watching the Throne, the complete Thai Rivera residency controversy gets even more spin, with Thai declaring the entire weekend a success on his social media and podcast. We listen as this toy boy spins yarns about how happy the venue was with the turnout, how well the shows went, and how impressed the audience was. Unfortunately for Thai, the audio and video evidence seems to contradict his rose-colored view of the entire residency, as well as his talent. We also get a response from comedian Ralph Tutela, who was intended to be Thai’s partner for the residency, but sobered up before the debut and backed out. Not even newer comics on the Vegas scene want to be a part of the implosion of a gay madman and his career …

Watching the Throne (Part 2 of 3)

July 14, 2021

A comedic review of the latest KING of comedy in Las Vegas. This one is a great tale from the C, and so many people helped provide insight in to the story being woven for your absolute amusement and horror. In Part 2, we listen in to another show featuring comedians Thai Rivera, Angie Krum and Dante Verduzco. It’s worse than the first, if that is at all possible, and the grift is real when it comes to Thai collecting money under the guise of this being a Vegas strip-worthy show. Strap in for another long episode with more unbelievable moments throughout, including Thai asking his feature act to leave in the middle of the show. This show was originally live streamed on June 17, 2021. Thai Rivera has since attempted to strike Nobody Likes Onions’ YouTube channel with a copyright takedown notice. …

Aftershow 1379: Zoom Comedy, Triggers

March 29, 2021

Patrick kicks off the show by trying to show off a new app that has been developed just for desperate comedians. As if Zoom shows are not bad enough, now there’s an app that let’s “comedians” perform live nightly to earn worthless points for twos of people. It’s getting rough out there. Patrick has trouble getting his iPad to display correctly on the stream. We watch a really cringe video with a conservative black commentator named Jesse Lee Peterson with comedians Shang and Ty Barnett. The comic duo seem to be confused about whether they are being held down or thriving in this era of racism. We learn what Christmas crackers are, because it’s not really an American thing. Long story short for anyone who doesn’t know – it’s not worth learning about. …

Aftershow 1375: Josh Denny / Thai Rivera

February 18, 2021

Our kiwi pal Moody says the show we’re watching today would have never happened without us Onions, but who knows? On this bonus show, we watch and review the paywalled morning show that Josh Denny recently did with Thai Rivera. Josh fudges timelines and catches himself several times. Moody calls Josh very racist throughout this show. Thai admits to watching Nobody Likes Onions, and both of them pretend to not know what the other is talking about. Who produces more cringe? Find out now. …

NLO 1366: Warbly Porker

November 20, 2020

Patrick is balls deep in the house buying process, and the stress is beginning to take it’s toll. He’s intimidated by the prospect of taking on the project of installing a pool in his back yard, and he feels pressured by Big Pool. Costco has a lot to answer for when it comes to how he was treated recently at the optical center. Along with being ignored at the service counter, he’s sick of being stalked like a D-level celebrity by cashiers. …

NLO 1346: Bad3

August 18, 2020

The gay giving tree that is Thai Rivera has birthed us a new comedian jester to keep our eyes on, Trez Mala. Patrick took years of Spanish in high school. so he’s pretty sure that means “bad three.” Or something close. In the first installment of two, we listen to Trez talk about himself and his comedy roots and philosophy on some other gas weasel’s podcast. If you’ve never heard of the MoonBug Glip Glop podcast, strap in …

NLO 1334: Cryptic Shade

July 17, 2020

This show is a brave message to those out there who have to deal with bullying on an everyday basis. Patrick woke up to find himself being told of a lack of approval about a Facebook post he’d made the day before. Las Vegas comedian, or is it comic, Thai Rivera spins out in manic glory over a silly post, resulting in a chain of hilarity and weird pointless hating that can only be classified as virtue signaling horseshit. …

NLO 1332: Simon Says

July 6, 2020

Patrick is up in the middle of the night to connect with comedian George Dimarelos in Melbourne, Australia. George gives Patrick the honest truth about what the rest of the world thinks about America during this pandemic. The duo remembers easier times at comedy festivals months ago. Patrick expresses frustration about the coronavirus testing process, and still has no results yet. Kanye is running for president and we aren’t sure whether to take it seriously. …